A Story With Much Violence, But No Sex

It was around 1:00am when Sarah's eyes opened. Something was happening.

She was sleeping with Lana, also known as the superhero the Flame. This itself wasn't unusual, they had done this quite a bit in the last two months.

No. What was important they hadn't had sex first.

It was Wednesday, and she had come over after working on the days shoot, with bluerays of the first three star war movies, the new ones...well, you know what i am talking about: Episodes 1-3. Lana had never seen them before. They watched the first two. She had, of course, seen the original movies...she wasn't that strange. But not the next three Lucas made in the nineties.

They ended up watching the Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones. Both were actually a lot better then she had remembered they were supposed to be. Both had a couple of fun action  sequences, even if some of the performances were pretty stiff. Yoda with a lightsaber made her clap her hands. Lana had made them a light dinner (for someone who claimed to want to gain weight she didn't eat that much). It was fun. As they watched them with her she seemed to enjoy it to a degree, effecting in her weird semi-emotionless, hard-to-read kind of way that this was passable entertainment. Lana, whose taste tended more toward theatre, classical music, and the legitimate arts, didn't talk them down. She sat and watched...well, like a girlfriend who was sitting with their partner and trying to like what they like.

Girlfriend: After about three months, yeah...that was increasingly the word.

And so she slept over. They had kissed before going to bed a bit and she was snuggling into her a bit, but she was still wearing her work clothes at 12:35. Tommorow she had set her clock to wake her at 7am for a 8am shoot at the studio...and yeah, she was a girlfirend coming to her SO house tonight not to have sex.

Not having sex was an important step. Her first boyfriend and her did it a couple of times before actually having sex when she was a teenager - but after that..well. Here she was. Only with Jim (who stayed with her a couple of weeks between roommates on a trial basis that never lasted more than a trial) had she ever done this with before.

It wasn't bad. Lana had a nice big bed, in an impeccably kept house. Lana was a small thing and didn't take up much of the space or the covers. And while she had the personality of a cold fish, her body was actually quite warm, in a snuggable way.

Fuck. She would have to go to work tomorrow wearing the same clothes she came into after not fucking.

Maybe it was time to ask for a drawer.

Sarah sighed. It would be impossible to walk out of the room now. And should she?

That's when it went off in her mind. The feeling...the sense. Something was wrong.

Something was incredibly wrong.

And not with their relationship.

She shook her head. She would have to deal with this...

"Lana" she said to the woman next to her.She pressed agianst her slightly.

"What is it," she asked sleepily, not quite waking up.

"Trouble. It's...I don't know...but I can sense it. Something big."

Lana woke up opening her eyes with almost inhuman speed. Like her, of course, she was slightly inhuman. Just in a different way.  "Any more information?"

"Downtown."

Lana got out of bed and went to her closet, pushing aside garments as she did, until she found her gingham dress that was the costume of the Eternal Flame. Part of the performance aspect, she had told Sarah.

"I'm coming with you, of course."

Sarah sighed. She had never gone on patrol with the Eternal Flame before. She didn't like going "On patrol". Sarah and Lana here...well, something. But 'Mazing Girl and the Eternal Flame were not nothing.

Sarah shook her head. How could she stop her? She got out of bed. " Can you drive? It'd feel odd carrying you."

"Doesn't quite work well with my image in any method. Sure."

Sarah undressed in front of her, taking off her work polo shirt her work pants. Flame was doing the same. She had undressed for her lover before. Now she was undressing as if they were going to play soccor or something.

This was important. This was a step. And she didn't know what she was feeling. Lana's advantage, and her downside as a lover, as she could never quite get a read on what she was feeling, good or bad. For a telepath, she had no real idea what she was thinking.

*******

They were taking the Flame's black '48 Packard. Lana drove a Lexus, but you know, well...image. The car was not a stock Packard. It had a much more powerful and quick engine, the tires were modern, and there was surprisingly powerful equipment built into its dashboard but the idea was the same.

They drove down surface streets, Sarah slumped in the seats.

"Do you have any more information?" Lana asked.

"It's big, and it's downtown. Like, around City Hall, I want to say. That area," Sarah told her.

Sarah was never quite sure what it was that guided her. It should be perhaps explained that all of the heroes and villains who had actual power as far as was known were mutants of a kind. Most of them where psychic, some of them were more physical. One in a million or so was like this for genetic reasons no one fully understood. Now, through large portions of human history, one in a  million meant one or two in the whole world. They often fell into myth and superstition, or hid it as whatever. It wasn't until the late 19th century that anyone really suspected they existed - it wasn't until the 1920s when proof was gained. Comic book stories were developing and they became creatures of comicbooks. Which was just as well, as circus freak or all powerful tyrant was not a good thing either.

However, Sarah had been blessed underneath her nerdy charm to be have a fair amount of religion. Nerds often did. She had grown up in a fairly religious Tallahassee area family. She had been brought up baptist, and somewhere inside her still believed in God, and that God gave her these gifts, to either use to bless humanity or punish it.

Or, to put it another way: Her family knew about 'Mazing Girl. Her family supported 'Mazing Girl. She hadn't told them about Lana and wasn't sure how to. But if they were sleeping together and not having sex, she probably ought to.

Lana drove on. "Going to turn on the scanners?"

"No need," said Sarah as she looked up.

And there truly was no need, for floating above the downtown skyline was a giant blimp emblazened with metal decals. And huge artillery raining down fire.

*****

"Deca."

The police had setup a roadblock around the downtown area, but when Flame and 'Mazing Girl came they opened the road for them. "He's doing something really big. Shooting some of the buildings. Thankfully, at this time of night, the area is mostly empty. We're scrambling some jets from Mugu, but they'll take awhile. Really glad your here."

"She gave me a lift." 'Mazing Girl nodded to Flame and the 10 police in the command center. That was technically true.

Flame had a look that made it impossible to tell what she was thinking. "So: Deca. Hes finally made his move."

"No demands, or loudspeaker, thankfully," said the captain.

"He wants me," 'Mazing Girl informed them. "Well...that's always the case. It's time we end this."

"But not alone." For a second Sarah thought Flame said it, and would feel a bit of the heart string. But no. Behind her was.... Glider.

He wasn't actually (wearing? using?) his hang-glider. He wore a suit that looked a lot like a World War I pilot uniform. All leather, with dashing cavalry pants and a leather helmet with googles. In a steampunk nightclub worn by a girl who was 20 years younger then the 40-ish paunchy hero it would look dashing. Perhaps when he started out it would look dashing. now he looked a little silly.

"He knows you can get there easily with your jumping powers. But Flame, and the others, are powerless to help. But not me!! For you can run, but you can't glide."

Catchphrase. She needed one. His was catchy, she'll give it that.

"He can fly. You can jump. I'll figure something out," the Flame at last suggested.

"Your just going to let me go up there by myself?" demanded 'Mazing Girl, shocked by her lack of emotion at all of this.

"you're your own hero, 'bnazing. you have skills and talents that i don't. i am not going to smother you," said Flame.

"Smother me?"

"Oooh," said a police officer, shaking his head.

"Don't 'oooh' me!" said 'Mazing Girl. "The last thing I need, or anyone needs in this situation, is a giant 'oooh' going on. That doesn't help ithe sitution in the slightest most infimestimal"

"are you frightened?" asked Flame.

"Yeah, I'm frightened. This guy has a giant fucking blimp. A giant fucking blimp. I am not joking. Giant fuckin....g blimp.!!!1How do you build something like that?"

Flame put a hand on her shoulder. It was very calm and friendly. "I wish I could take your fear from you, but I can't. nothing to be said.nlimp and all. all I can say is what is obvious. you are the most powerful hero in the city. you're stronger then all the rest of us put together! i have tremendous faith in your powers, and your skills."

Glider nodded. "Give me a minute to get ready. We should try a co-ordinated attack."

Flame looked thoughtful a moment. "i think it's a helium balloon, which means its non-flamable, but i'll try to figure out something, well, useful."

Glider walked away.

"I could just carry you. I have done with Knife Girl a dozen times. "

"i'll find a way."

'Mazing Girl leaned in to whisper. "are you frightened?"

((would it help you for me to say i was?))

'Mazing Girl shook her head. No reading this woman.

*******

'Mazing girl walked away from the police cars. She looked up at the blimp. It was shooting a lot of things. She saw Glider go up.

"Ready to go when you are," he boldly declared, and lowered his goggles into place as she smiled at him slightly.

Then what looked like a rocket hit him, and he exploded.

'Mazing Girl freaked out for a second and screamed, but realised that would do her nor anybody else any good. Instead, she flew up into air with the scream still on her lips.

*****

It was dark inside the blimp. No one was present. She wondered if Deca had brought any thugs or things of that nature with him. For a second it occured to her that a viable strategy might be to wait 'til she got there then detonate it remotely. It would be a smart play if he wanted to kill her, but something about him suggested otherwise.

He wanted to face her.

Then an intercom went off. "WELL, IT TURNED OUT IN THE END THAT HE COULD NEITHER RUN OR GLIDE."

"Can you hear me?" asked Mazing Girl

"I WOULDN'T MISS THIS FOR THE WORLD."

'Mazing Girl shrugged. The logical place for the control would be at the front/underneath of the gondola  but realistically it could be anywhere. Even inside the balloon itself. She looked around.

"I HAVE TAKEN THE TIME TO MAKE ROBOT GUARDS. DON'T WORRY...I DO THINK YOU CAN BEAT THEM. BUT THEY MAY...TIRE YOU...A BIT"

He wasn't making this easy. Nonetheless, the Airforce was going to come in at some point and deal with this, so perhaps a viable strategy was to distract him a bit by fighting guards and come for him then.

Nope.

She saw the guard robots. It would be nice to say they were large metal robots with hands and tin pots for head but they where short squat robots that walked on four legs. With a large gun on top of their body. There were about 20 of them and they all shot her at once.

That hurt a lot.

So she ran. Right through them, down the hall they came from, past them...

Ran down on down the hallway.

Right over a large opening into the sky.

She fell in an instant, down into the sky, falling and flailing her arms and probably looking a little stupid. Then she gained calm again, from somewhere. This was moments that needed calm.

Nope...falling.

She straightened herself.

And then got shot by a giant artlerly shell.

That hurt an awful lot.

She realised that the lower half of her costume was entirely gone, leaving her in hopefully clean panties. Her dignity was hurt. As was the rest of her.

And she needed to get this fucker down...

She hit the ground, and pushed down against it, destroying the concrete street as she did. Sarah shot right up, very nearly breaking the speed of sound.

And went through the blimp like a giant bullet.

She went through the  cabin  then the balloon. Blimps have a lot of steel girders in them, she hit a couple before breaking through the top, making a huge hole as she saw the night sky.

She landed on top of it.

The blimp was bleeding helium. Despite what you might think, it wasn't an incredibly fast process but it was a process underway. It was going down. No matter what happened this flight would be over at some point in the very near future. She saw 1000's of police officers (that may have been an exaggeration) on the ground. It looked like the national guard. This would be over. Deca couldn't escape. She had won. She had saved the city.

She flopped down on top of the balloon exhausted. Her body was covered in soot and scars. Every part of her hurt. Every part of her.

Yet she would still get to work tomorrow. She didn't want to get the reputation of someone who missed days.

But now she relaxed.

"What a waste," observed Nighthawk, who was somehow standing next to her. "Pathetic."

"The blimps going down. I saved us."

"The blimps not the problem. He is! And look at you: Slacking. You and all your terrific powers. What a waste on a pathetic slacker like yourself. I worked for this...a thousand hours in the gym, training my body to the peak of humanity. And you come in with your fancy tricks to make the people love you. But they never guess what a waste you are, Sarah. Yeah...I know: Ms. Jennings. All the power in the world and you will never live up to your potential."

Mazing giirl looked at him

"Well  you mani-pedi!"

That was a good comeback. That was amazing. Nighthawk...

Well...Nighthawk suddenly had a huge hole in his chest as Deca stuck his hand through it from behind. He fell over...dead.

"SARAH HUH?" said  Deca "JENNINGS? NICE TO MEET YOU."

Sarah stood up on the top of the falling blimp. Deca was there hovering, he had some type of jetpack thingy. It made his giant black cape swish a bit.

She adjusted a bit. "What do you possibly hope to accomplish?" she asked "" I am not trying to trick you, or anything, I just honestly, honestly, want to know the point of all of this."

"You," Deca told her, in a surpsingly normal voice. "You were always the goal. He was right, you know. Ms. Jennings, you are the most powerful super in the world. Your powers, your skills, are greater then anyone else on the planet."

"No...thats not true. Hiro, Defender, Maiden of..."

"Reputation. Goverments wanting there champions to seem mighty. Newspapers selling papers. But I didn't say reputation. You are stronger, faster, tougher...all of it. You are the ultimate expression of humanity. And if I destroy that, then thats what I will be."

"No," Sarah protested. Then she realised that this guy was crazy. She had beaten him before, and that probably inflated her a bit in his eyes. It had to be that.

Wasn't it?

Ah fuck.

As it went through her mind she thought about the big heroes of the past. The one that had saved cities from destruction. Strong; Brave. sometimes backed by society - but her powers was just amazing. While plenty of them had been strong, her strength was beyond theirs. She was.....

Well, time for the most powerful hero in the world to do her thing.

"This is for Brian"

She jumped forward off the blimp grabbing him and flying forward with him at 250 miles an hour, into the side of a bank two or three miles away.

She hoped she was smashing into something heavy, but it was really just the windows. They came to a stop inside an office.

Deca then punched her in the head. That hurt probably the most of anything so far.

"Since the last time we were together I've increase my hydraulic power tenfold. I hope that's enough. I doubt it a bit...but one can hope."

She punched him agian  "This is for Joe"

Deca turned." The first one i remember....the second one"

"And that is why you suck" said Sarah as she kicked him in the chest.

"Improved armour protection, too."

Sarah paused as he punched her again. This was hurting. The artillery earlier hadn't helped, but this was hurting. She punched at him, but he dodged it. He punched her, but she grabbed his arm and threw him out of the building and to the ground bellow.

She caught her breath for a second, but then he just flew back up out the window.

"Jetpack."

It was then that a rain of bullets hit her, pounding her as she ducked behind a support column.

"Coward!" She ran through the building - literally through the building, not bothering to stop for walls - until she hit the side of the last glass wall and jumped out.

"I am not the 90 pound weakling in a stupid suit!"

She jumped towards the police men in central city. that whoudl give her more protection.

She noted that the blimp had hit the side of one of the huge courthouses and was coming down with a bit of a crash. It didn't look that bad though.

She also noted that he was following her

"PATHETIC!"

A stream of bullets flew at her, spewing into the night.

She hit the side of the courthouse with her feet and like a swimmer and flew right back into him.

This smashed him, knocking him and his jetpack down. He crashed  in a park, skidding into a fountain.

She adjusted a bit and landed on the Time building before jumping down next to him.

With her, 100 policemen encircled him.

"Stand back! Let me handle it!" "Mazing Girl commanded, with more authority then she could usually muster. They listened to her.

She grabbed Deca's body as it faltered, and punched off his mask. There was his face. His real face...like a Scooby-Doo villain. He was a small man, really...small and pathetic.

She then felt an incredible sensation at the back of her neck, felt it smashing. Her trouble-detector, only at a 100 times the normal magnitude.

He  was still on the ground. "You forgot my power, 'Mazing Girl: Getting into your mind. It is amazing. I can get in there and trigger that little sense of yours...too much? Hmmm...let's see what it does..."

Sarah fell to the ground. The sense of horror his horror was too much for her. Too fucking much she felt incredible. All of the evils of the world entering her skull unfettered by rhyme or reason.

"90 pound weekling in a suit? Guilty. All that time and energy, robots meca and i had it all along"

Sarah felt the world's pain, it's suffering, all in her head. All of it at once.

When someone else walked over.

"hello brother," the Eternal Flame greeted Deca  as she walked onto the scene from out of nowhere.

"Hello sister" said Deca. "Oh, you didn't know this? Or did you? That Flame and I are twin brother and sister?"

"near identical power-sets," said Flame. " i didn't want to fight you, i admit. nut you give me no choice."

Sarah could barely look up at the scene in front of her.

"Oh." Deca smiled, standing up.  "I just peeked in her mind. Really? Her? That's where your getting your pleasures? This makes it all the sweeter! Dear sister, do you want to know if she loves you? You're too polite, or perhaps too scared to find out...but you want to know, don't you?"

Sarah could feel the power, as it grew stronger it grew more pronouced. She realized that 92 people had died tonight, 140 had some form of injury, 12,453 where in a massive traffic jam as the restult of closing downtown, and 12,234,234 where worried watching this on the news, worried for their loved ones, worried for the families. Sarah learned that it if she had captured him that night 6 months ago none of this would have happened. She learned of the massive property damage he had caused (she had caused), all the destruction and evil that had happened. A giant looming darkness. And perhaps, in her most fevered moments, she could sense something beyond it, something beyond words or meaning. Something.

And then a thought entered her head. He was *monarching* her. He was treating this as if it was a game they were playing. None of it mattered except winning. All of that was irelevant. What was the point of taking a city that wasn't worth two licks?  Sarah was many things, but she cared. She was fat lets face it, a nerd, a slacker, and someone who ocasionaly smoked pot, but she cared.

And man did she hate the show the Venture Brothers.

Sarah was wracked with more pain then she had ever felt before, splayed on the ground. but then she closed her hand and got to her feet. Evil was afoot, and she was the 'Mazing lady sent to stop it.

Deca continued to wraped up in his monologuing. "Does the pathetic little stage-tech really care? Why bother telling you though, because now she is..."

"Done," Sarah finished for him, and punched him in the face. He fell over in a slumpy pile.

The pain was just gone. It was like it was never there. She got up as police swarmed around her and Deca's twitching body on the ground. The Flame drifted away, and she didn't see where she went. Sarah wasn't sure how much the police had heard of the little exchange. No one talked about it much, which was all for the best. But maybe just wishful thinking.

She walked away to the fire of the blimp.

Knife Girl was there, looking over the body of Nighthawk. They had taken off the mask.

"Michael."

Sarah paused. She had never seen Knife Girl's boyfriend, and a sudden thought occured to her. What if it had been Nighthawk? What if his reluctance masked the fact that it was really him and that they were secretly enemies and lovers. It would be poetic. Terrible for her, but poetic.

"Do you know him?" she asked Knife Girl.

"No. He was a TV weather man."

Sarah shook her head and looked at him, thought of glider, thought of all that had happened. The ranks of the heroes had dropped today. There would be stories about how brave all of them had been today, and what sacrifices they had made for the city. It gave little comfort. She had been a hero. She brought down his blimp defeated him, but that gave her no joy. It was kind of an awful night. And there would be another night like it soon enough. If not Deca(probably not Deca as that final punch may have broken his spine) but someone to fill the darkness with dread. And there was less light in it.

"I'm going to miss the fucker," confessed Knife Girl, and that was the exact thing to say.

And Sarah realised she was still just wearing panties on her bottom. She really hoped there wasn't a lot of cameramen.

"Can you get me, like. a blanket or something?" she asked a paramedic.

He did so, and got her water too. She went to sit down under a tree in the park.

"what a waste  my brother was," observed the flame from "when he saw our parents die he thought of fortune and fame. when he got our powers he wanted money. I let him...why not? but that wasn't enough, it was never enough. he wanted power for its own sake. greedy eyes."

Flame, of course, came from nowhere to sit next to Sarah. She put her hand on Sarah's knee.

"You should have told me" said Sarah.

"we have the same last name," Flame told her. "I would assume you could have figured it out."

Sarah chuckled slightly, and then she looked at Lana.She wasn't sad in a traditional sense, or crying. But Sarah looked up at Lana and she saw something human in her eyes. It was just a glance really, perhaps a tad of fear, worry, and panic.

"i was scared that they would get you," theFlame said. "afraid I would loose you. Thats why I didn't want to go with you. Too scared to see. Blimps."

And with that sarah paused consider something. She meant something to someone. She was melting the ice queen.

And, oh fuck, she was falling in love with her too. Fuck.

"Lana would you like a roommate?"

Was she saying this? She had a condo. Lana owned a Five bedroom house Mid-Wiltshire. A roommate was kind of silly. What, would she contribute to utilities?

Lana's eyes were starting to get misty and she could tell this wasn't tears of sadness. She was defiently breaking. Flame was getting sappy on her, and she was defiently getting sappy back.

"It would be nice you know...to have someone to come home to..and I know we can team up and stuff and..."

She was saying this. She was asking to fucking live together. In her head she thought about making a rose garden, and having children together. 401K's, and marriage with two little brides on the cake. Fuck.

Lana leaned in and hugged her. She was crying, or looked like it. She nuzzled into her neck with the look, if not incredible warmth,  tenderness.

This was so so not her. And lana was so not her type. They could never get a beer together, watch action movies together, discuss the merits of Iron Man together,  eat smoked meats together. Yet the imense desire to spend the rest of her fucking life with this women filed her with sudden mania.

"Can I read your thoughts?" Lana asked as she looked up at her. Her own eyes were weak, scared, vulnerable. Then she paused.

Sarah filled the space. "Okay. I just don...."

"No need. Your face tells me everything. It's not bad. It's not good, it's...you feel exactly what I'm feeling right now."

Sarah paused. Damn.

Lana finished Sarah's thought. "And that may not be love, that may not be forever, but goddammit if its not beautiful."

There is no perfect ending to this story. No ending that would be happily ever afte. Sarah was a bit of a flake. Lana had emotional issues up the ying-yang. Whether they stayed together or seperated they would do so with the knowledge of this perfect moment, and the fact that its promise could never be entirely fulfilled. Also, Lana was entirely lesbian and Sarah was  kind of fooling around.

Heroes didn't exist. Humanity was no good. Love's potential was doomed to folly.

But the next day Sarah went to a condo real estate agent and, damned if she didn't get  85% of her asking price. She was never happier.

Becuse it didn't have to be perfect. It didn't have to be neat, or clean or simple.

It was life.

And it was amazing.

In Which Utter Glory is Achieved

Sarah read a lot of comics - tons really. And there was a stock scene: A master jewel thief breaks through a huge high ceiling, into a laser beam full museum, to steal a gigantic gem.

And Sarah in her 'Mazing girl outfit, who was at the Los Angeles Natural History Museum's gem exhibit realised they left out something. Education! Sarah could see tons and tons interesting things about rocks and gemstones - how they formed, where they were found, and what they where made of.

(Mini triva Quiz: The plot of the Movie Star Trek 4 involved inventing Transparent aluminium - but what stone really is transparent aluminium? The answer at the end of this story...)

The musuem was just opening a major new expansion, and she had been invited to take a tour of the place by the police, in case something happened.

However, Sarah was slightly disapointed.

For one thing - relatively small ceilings. Second -  the gems weren't that big. Abstractly yes - big, but more in the demonstrate this is what an opal was, or this is what gold looked like in its natural state kind of way. The only really big thing was jade, which Sarah learned actually got pretty gigantic in the real world-but wasn't that expensive. It was disappointing.

It was perhaps a flaw of being a nerd. There was a certain kind of girlishness that was foreign to her. If any of these stones were to be put on a ring she would have oohed, ahhed, and sworn feality to whatever billionaire gave it to her. As if she had any idea of what a big rock actually looked like. These were, ahh, pretty stones. Stones that were worth more probabbly more then her condminiou-building, sure...but just pretty stones.

Then she saw a spectacular gem in the case she checking out. It shimmered in the light.

"Wow," said Sarah.  "I like this one. It's so big!"

"Its quartz," the museum director informed her.

"Is it expensive?" asked Sarah. The stone was about the size of a...a breadbasket, actually. Yes, Sarah mused, she'd had a breadbasket when she was a kid, and that was exactly the proper dimension for it.

"One this big? A couple of hundred bucks."

Huh?

"Gems are all about rarity - quartz is something like 1/4 of the Earth's mass."

Sarah didn't know that. Again: Education.

And then they left and went to see the dinosaurs. Sarah saw a Plateosaurus for the first time ever. The 8 year old in her was pretty pysched.

******

That was about four months ago. Now sarah was back in the museum - as Sarah. On the big central palladium (was that the right word?). Normally, she recalled, was a giant tyrannosaurus menacing a stegosaurus. Now...now was....

A gem case.

She was there to film an episode of the seventh district, where there is a jewel robbery. The plot line veered somehow into something to do with white slavery . The plots of the seventh district could do that.

But now...they where in the museum, which she learned could be rented for film shoots pretty cheap.

And she had the obligation of finding a really big looking stone.

Sarah of course had the mental problem with gems of - she was a super strong woman. She thought she could have taken a lump of coal and squeeze it into a diamond. Well that was the theory. In reality (which she would have learned if she paid more attention to the graphics and helpful logos) it would take a much bigger a piece of coal in order to produce a diamond she could see with a microscope - and just squeezing it with her hands wouldn't have been even enough pressure. She would have to use the more traditional method of having someone spend 3 months salary.

So, remembering some good advice, she went to a jewellery store got a quartz and glazed it dark purple. She figured it would look better than glass as it had slight imperfection in it. It was clever.

"Sure! This looks good, Jennings!" Todd Nelson, the director for this episode, praised her.

"I think it will photograph well," Sarah told him.

"This light..."

"It;s got a mysterious quality," said Sarah.

Todd shook his head.

He often shook his head. Nelson was a very head shakey director as the things he had to deal with were just okay.

Sarah didn't like him much, but the bueaty of dramatic television was that she she had to work with him maybe three times a year for a week. The way he kept shaking his head, made it worse.

The next problem with the gem case was itself - it was easy to make brakeaway glass. It's a delicious desert of sugar, that Sarah being Sarah sometimes ate after they used it. Don't judge her. She went to a freak show when she was a kid. It fascinated her...it...well, don't judge her.

But sugar glass didn't cut well with normal tools, which meant they had to use real glass and a real glass cutter, and a real guy suspended above it in a harness, which was a tricky stunt...but well, she wasn't a stunt woman. Actually, that whould have been a good career option now that she thought about it. She remembered reading a superman book where he went into that, but she never really thought about it.

So as they lowered a very nice actor down on a wire, Sarah sat off camera working on the stunts. she thought about going into the next hall to look at the Plateosaurus agian - but technically speaking she was working.

Until she felt something on the back of her neck.

It was, by her standards, light. Very light. No one was in danger. That was okay. But something was wrong...

Wrong, of course, was a touchy feely word. Sarah's ability to predict stuff was something she had trouble categorising. For a woman who in someway perhaps overdid her humanity it was something alien. The gift of man, the bible said, is the ability to know good from evil. She did. But one couldn't quite put it into words. It was a feeling - to explain would be like trying to describe blue.To translate it into thought, something her conscious mind could process, was not something even she could do very well. Sarah's power to know when something bad was happening, she thought in her more abstract moments, was probably greater then all her other powers put together. At some level, if she really tried, in her darkest moments...it may have been something similar to omnipotence, to know all and see all - to have the power of God himself.

Or perhaps she was sensing someone stealing a buck from a tip jar. It was hard to say.

Because as she organised materials for the next scene, she couldn't quite say.

But like say a pebble in her shoe, she couldn't ignore it eith.

She closed her eyes and to walked off. Whatever it was, it was close...maybe 50 feet.

And then she realized something was happening in the jewelery room.

Sarah always kept her costume bag nearby - which, in a world where the police pretty much no longer cared about things like search and seizure laws, she realised was going to be a problem someday. But she would cross that bridge when she came to it. Perhaps by jumping very high in the air to clear the river entirely.

She ran into a bathroom - which was very nicely kept by the way. Good thing about being a superheroine: You got see a lot of quality bathrooms. This one looked, like most of the museum, to have been built in 50s, and they really didn't make 'em like they used to. This one was built in the 50s and had quality tiles, fixtures - class act.

However, 20 seconds later - which was very fast for her - she was out of her clothes and into her costume, even counting a brief little panty dance she did.

And then she raced down the hallway to the jewlery room.

She knew abstractly that there was a very sophisticated security system in there - the kind that didn't include those flashy lasers that you see in movies, but real motion detectors, video surveillance, pressure plates on the floor, and the whole shebang. All that and a very thick vault door. In short, it was as an impressive bit of security.

Of course, Sarah could have stolen everything in the place in like two or three minutes, going through the vault like it was tissue paper and the like. But she wouldn't ever do something like that...good and evil and all that jazz. Superhuman ethics - stealing money required an economic system, stuff with the federal reserve, continuing resolutions of congress. That sort of thing. She focused instead on the what.

And so she entered into a now dark hall. Huh? She remembered the lighting being good here. Which was something that the movies (And TV show such as the one she was in effect working on) left out. They turned off the lights in real life.

However they should be on.

No windows or anything either.

And Sarah, who was incredibly strong, unspeakably tough, and uncannily fast, was suprisingly bad in darkness. Her actual senses where no better then anyone else's - worse really, as she was nearsighted.  At night she could get around well enough by moonlight - and streetlight. Los Angeles was a well lit city. But in here...with literally no light source...

It was times like this when she wished she had a utility belt with a flashlight. But whenever she thought of a utility belt the couple of times she needed it a year, she always forgot about it - and it was just more stuff to traipse around in the bag and...

Sigh.

Long term planning was never 'Mazing Girl's strong suit. Or Sarah's, really. But that was a longer issue - to be agonised over when drunk.

She did know something. There was only doorway out of this room, with not even an emergency exit, and she was standing in it.

she wandered in as far as the opening would allow to see.

And then the large bank door closed behind her, and she was in total darkness.

Which, in truth, she found kind of freaky.

She shook her head for a second.

She resisted the urge to walk in one direction until she saw light. That would damage something, and probably more than the value of whatever jewellery was being stolen, which was insured. But the museum probably hadn't upped it to include the "Scared Supergirl" clause, though.

Fear was useful.

However, being punchy wasn't. If she punched, say, a glass display or something, something would be badly hurt.

She closed her eyes. No real reason, she just did.

She extended her senses. This was a techniques she sometimes used. Her hearing, her sense of smell...but mostly her hearing.

There was a light brushing of something....

And she was hit - a punch to mid chest.

No real pain, but...

She reached forward and connected with something.

She didn't actually grab it, but felt something.

she wasn't alone.

Okay, this was something...

Someone, or thing, was in this room with her. It processed available information. It viewed her as a threat. It viewed her as a threat it could reasonably deal with - which given the amount of force to her sternum, was incorrect. It had control over the security system in the room.

These were good thoughts to have in the dark with something she could hear breathing.

The she heard a shriek. The sound of a bird, a hawk, in the night.

Huh?

She recognised that sound.

iI punched her agian, connecting hard with her stomach, a flurry of blows that did knock her back  tossed down less so from her lack of strengh more so then her lack of balance. She screamed almost despite herself at the fear, and the terror at the sence...

Wait a fucking second she had super powers

She got up he hit her.

She didn't sell it

Agian.

Nope

he extended his arm she could tell and she grabed it and flipped around so hard  he flew across the room into a sighn explaining with sedimentary rock was he crashed with a loud singe.

"Whats going on, Knighthawk?"

And the lights came on.

There, standing in front of her, was knighthawk, who was, after Sarah - and maybe the Flame, the number 2 hero in the city. Really, 'Mazing Girl was number one and two...

"The musuem asked me to test the security system" Knighthawk explained. "To see if there are risks...any holes."

Sarah nodded. Wasn't that a plot of a movie she saw when she was a kid? With a famous actor?

(What movie is sarah thinking about: See the end of the story to find out. Also was it any good? Spoiler: No)

 Sarah reached in and grabbed the hand of Knighthawk

"HEY!!!"

Sarah looked, pulling off the glove, or gauntlet - or what ever you would call the kind of built armour thing he had. Gauntlet would be perhaps a little too comicbook-like.

"What are you doing?" Knighthawk demanded.

"I remember your hand," said Sarah, as she looked over the well manicured fingers of Knighthawk.

"Well, your good for something," said Knighthawk. "You ruined my little excersie. I managed to take over the front of their security system, but I wasn't able to see if I could successfully escape through the manned exit of the building"

"Well, I think we successfully proved you couldn't," Sarah observed. "Because 'Mazing Girl is here!"

Knighthawk put his glove back on.

"This is expensive, and ruined. Corundum, lots of delicate mechanisms...not that someone like you would know anything about craft."

"'Mazing girl!!"

Just then, the vault door opened and a dozen guards rushed in.

"What's going on?" demanded the guard as he raised his gun.

"Check with the museum director," said Knighthawk. "Protocol 34."

"No need officer. Mazing girl is here!"

This was the moment that all her blood and sweat and tears made worthwhile. The moment when she realized she could be a comicbook superhero, a creature of a Saturday morning cartoon. It was a surpisingly rare moment, but a glorious one. Utterly glorious.  She looked not quite straight ahead.

"Check with your procedure," Knighthawk instructed. "You know how I hate having to deal with rent-a-cops."

One of the officers protested with hurt sounding "Hey!"

"No offence,," said Knighthawk.

"While you sort this out," said Sarah, hands on her hips, "'Mazing girl has a city to protect!" She jumped up  a couple of feet then troted out of the room as superheroically as she could.

As she left, Knighthawk turned to the guards.

"I really hate her," confessed Knighthawk. "I really, really, do. It's just like this thing now. This thing that eats my soul and..."

"She makes you look like an idiot in a bird mask."

"I just really, really, hate her."

********

Sarah made her way back to the set - or in this case, the central plaza of the museum - quietl, though in fact they weren't recording sound so it didn't matter. Which was good, as despite whatever commotion had happened they were still filming.

Sarah watched an actor, carefully lowered down, use a glass tube on a case and pull out the gem -  another actor playing a security guard came at him with a gun.. and there followed a brief kind of wire-fu fight. It was a fun scene, though it took about three hours to shoot for maybe 45 seconds of screen time...but it was fun.

As she watched the guards push Knighthawk roughly out walk up the stairs to the office of the museum director, Sarah tried not to laugh - not as glorious as that.

She was a stinker wasn't she?

*

Answer to trivia question 1: Rubies!! Rubies are transparent aluminum. Also Saphires, and rare padparadscha, which are all forms of corundum.

Answer to trivia Question 2: Sneakers!!! with Robert Redford!! and Dan Akryoid

Answer to trivia Question 2 pt 2: While the kind of look at early 90s computer security has some fun elements, and it does create a cinematic view of hacker culture(though dated), the thriller plotline isn't very good and Redford kind of sleepwalks through his performance.

Answer to trivia question 3: Yes she was a stinker.

Magruff the Crime Dog to the Rescue!!

Tales of an ‘Mazing Girl: Magruff the Crime Dog to the Rescue!!

"So...crime-awareness event," said Sarah.

"’Couple of hours, say a few words, go on local news. The Mayor’s there, lt. Governor, it’ll be good publicity. Plus, you

know, lots of kids and you can tell them about stuff," said the voice on the phone.

She was sitting by herself in an unused greenroom of the studio they were shooting in. The voice on the other end, belonged

to Gregory Larson, who was her attorney and spokesperson. She had saved him, very early on in her career, from a car fire,

since then he offered his services pro bono. He liaised with the Mayors office, and a little bit with the press. She called

him every couple of weeks.

He was a nice guy as most lawyers actually are, and he had her interests at heart - though he got good publicity out of this

as well. She needed someone like him, and he was smart, tough when had to be, and looked absolutely nothing like her at all.

She didn't want to hire Peter Parker to do this and get people confused.

"So...Saturday the 12th...10am...I guess I know the deal. Want me to make a big entrance?”

"You want to," said Larson.

Sarah nodded. She liked big entrances.

"Since this is how to spot crime, the office has a script they want you to follow. You know, ‘be cautious’, a 10 point plan

what to do if your in danger. This is aimed at the kiddies so they probably know what they’re doing. I'll email you what they

gave me, you can email me back any changes and I'll give it back. We can massage a speech."

Sarah didn't like giving prepared speeches. This was particularly true with politicians who liked to be seen next to her to

get their photo-ops. Politicians love photos. She had been in the Mayor’s office and there was a giant wall in his giant

office full of photos of him with presidents, senators...and yes...’Mazing Girl.

Well what can you do? She was in LA, endorsing a Democrat wasn't going to change anything anywhere, so why bother.

But you know it sounded like a good cause, and kids did look up to her.

"Ill do it," said Sarah.

****

"Don't hurt me," begged the thug in her hand, her right hand, suspended easily a foot above the ground

She was at the docks. It was one of those classic comicbook locations you don't really see much. Except it wasn't just any

dock. It was Marina Del Ray, one of the world’s largest small-berth marinas. Big boats shipped big things. Small boats, like

yachts and cruisers shipped small things...like heroin. This place was less giant tramp steamers and more sailboats to drink

boat-drinks in.

And she wasn't actually sure he could be classified as a thug. He looked more like a college kid in over his head. But she

tended to classify most people she fought as thugs.

"Where do you plan to take this crap?" inquired a voice behind her. Nighthawk. His dead eye mask unleashed a fearsome visage.

Sarah shook her head. She was not, as a general principal, a person who followed a drug trail from source to the street.

Nighthawk was. Still, she didn't want to step in on his turf. She instead turned the thugs body towards him.

"Tell us. You know how strong she is, and I bet you want to keep your limbs."

Sarah sighed. She was also not a ‘threaten deadly violence’ type of hero. Nighthawk, as well she knew, wasn't a killer. But

he liked to give the impression that he was.

"No, no!" cried the ‘thug’.

"‘Mazing, can you put a little pressure on his right arm?"

Sarah grabbed it. She pulled lightly on it. She don't want to actually hurt him. She didn't want to...

"Let’s just take him into the police. They got a ton of evidence here...I mean this boat is full of drugs," Sarah suggested.

Nighthawk sighed. He broke character, just a tad, in exasperation.

"She’s a good person. Doesn't want to hurt a thug like you.” Nighthawk turned to Sarah. "Can you leave us, good mask, crazy

mask."

Sarah paused. No she didn't want to leave him.

"See you at the harbourmaster."

And then she jumped, still holding her quarry, into the sky.

The cops at the harbormaster station took him in, with only a few questions (she didn't know the exact slip he was hanging

about, but gave good directions, and pointed out the color).

She didn't go back as she expected Nighthawk to be there. But as she landed at a small park, she saw him. How he got there -

how he got anywhere -  she didn't know.

"What kind of shit was that?" he demanded.

"I'm here to help people, not beat-up college kids."

"You have such potential up there - but you can't see it down here. To fight fear you need to be fear," he scoured.

"To create hope you need to be hope."

That was one of her better lines. She added it to give in her speech. Then it clicked.

"I am giving a speech next week on crime-awareness in the city. Maybe you should give it. You know so, so much about crime

and all that."

Nighthawk scowled "I don't face the public. I would loose my menace."

"And your not a lot without menace," observed ‘Mazing. She was feeling pretty good about herself.

"You’re a mix of ego and failure," he shot back.  When ‘Mazing girl turned to retort he wasn't there.

Well, he got the last word in, not that bad.

Which is why ‘Mazing was glad she hadn't told him that the thug had in fact told her his buyer’s location in mid air.

********

"I like that line," said Janey "Yo create hope you need to be hope."

Sarah was at dinner with Janey - Knife Girl. They were at an olive garden after work (Janey had gotten an office job

recently, for between gigs).

She was good at agreeing to things. This often involved consuming liquor, but since both where driving they didn't today. She

was missing dinner with her fiancé. Sarah and Janey’s fiancé, for various reasons (mainly to keep her secret identity), had

never met, which was a shame.

Janey was pawing at a salad. The dinner of people with abs. Sarah was eating pasta. The dinner of people who didn't worry.

"I wish you could do it," said Sarah "You’re good at talking.”

"What? Teach them about knife safety," said Janey.

Actually she had done a PSA about knife safety just a year ago. Knife Girl did do a little bit of public stuff, but there was

a kind of implied contractbetween her and society. they feared Knife Girl, they accepted Janey, and they loved Sarah. It was

unfair, but what could you do.

"I wouldn't want to be the opening act anyway," said Janey.

Sarah felt guilty now. She often felt guilty. She had won the superpower lottery, and the public opinion lottery, yet she

didn't really appreciate it as much as she should.

But she knew Janey, who before becoming an actress had been a former mercenary. For someone who played a teenager on TV, she

had spent a lot of her actual youth doing things in South America that American teenagers could never handle. She knew that

Janey had, as was observed in a really corny line in the Avengers movie, a large amount of blood on her hands and was trying

to pay it off. Janey would never use lines like that but there you go. No sane human being would use a line like that. But

Janey was living a clean life in Cerritos, had a house and a guy she loved, and a job she liked...and a passion for fighting

crime. No, she was okay, and she accepted that.

Still, they occasionally did irresponsible things.

But tonight they just ate pasta. Sarah ate maybe two bowls.

********

Sarah stood on top of a small apartment building and looked over the location of the warehouse. Actually it was a suburban

garage in Palms. It looked well...like most other suburban garages. That was the occasional problem with a lot of crime in

LA: it didn't look as you wanted it to.

She was trying to scout this one. She had thought about asking Knife Girl along to salt the wounds of the jerk Nighthawk, but

figured she should handle this her way. Do it ‘Mazing style, just to show them...after all, Knife Girl, despite their

friendship, did use the knives a lot.

What mazing style ment she was a little vauge on. But certainly less knives.

Sarah shook her head. She was above that. She would attack the operation in broad daylight and see what she could find.

Really, she should get a warrant. Yes actually, she would call Larson setup a sting and catch them in he act, the villains. 

That was the ‘Mazing thing to do. ‘Be hope’.

When she felt a presence on her shoulder.

"there isn't anything in there worth bothering about," said the voice.

She turned to see out of mist that came from nowhere walked the figure of The Flame. "i’ve checked this lead for the last five months. the cops have been here twice. whenever there’s a delivery he moves it within 20 minutes. worried about the cops, worried about his suppliers coming back, the man is clever i'll grant him."

Sarah sighed.

"it’s crime. it’s just catching him in the act. in all men’s souls there is a beast, a darkness. Most of the time they wear masks of virtue... but its just a mask. even the foulest creature can tip his hat to you in the street."

"Most people don't wear hats and don't tip them."

The flame shook her head. But maybe, just maybe, there was a laughing smile...no. "the darkness. our failing is we can only really strike in the split second they let it out let out, their monster."

"By becoming one," said Sarah.

Flame put a hand on her shoulder. It wasn't cold. It was surprisingly warm. And surprisingly tender.

"we can't all be monsters. we need hope. I heard you where giving a speech on crime-awareness."

Sarah nodded.

"i’ll bet if you do a fine job, and make kids just a little bit more wary of strangers and candy and drugs, that will do more good then you or I will do a year. yes there is hope, and sometimes we need a person who is hope."

Flame talked to the police on occasion, the press even. But she would never....

"i would like to come to this speech. It’s on saturday in griffith park?"

"I am not sure they would..."

"just to hear it" said Flame, "to see the children happy, and glad to see their hero, giggling."

Sarah looked up at Flame and smiled. She had misjudged her. She put her hand on Flames, and squeezed gently.

"Then I am glad."

Flame let go and walked away.

"I suspect there’s a shipment on Sunday at 3:00. I can let you have the glory of bringing the gentleman in. As for myself...I care not."

Gee...she was nice today. And she didn't even have a heart.

****

Sarah gave the speech on Saturday. It was  tremendously patronizing and stupid. But she gave it with all her heart,

outlining 10 ways people could be more aware, even the youngest. She was glad to do, even glad to pose for pictures with

the Mayor who she privately thought was kind of a dick. Also hundreds of kids to.

She looked in the crowd but couldn't find Flame. But that was okay.

She tried to be hope, to make hope. That’s all she could do.

As did she realized each of them in their own way did the same. Her agent, the Mayor, the heroes, all of them.

Even though Nighthawk was a pretty big jerk.  .

Despite herself though, when she got home she looked up Batman/Superman slash fiction. It was strangely arousing.


The End...

Dance of the Sugar Cleaning Fairies

It was a Good Idea.  It wasn't sarah's entirely but it was a good idea.

When she had first moved to LA three years ago, she had met Wendy, who introduced her to Grace and F (her name was Florence, but everyone called her F). All of them were low industry girls at the time, living in the Southbay. Wendy and F were roommates of the non-sexual variety. Three years latter Sarah had become prop master on her own show. Janice had moved from working at a rental shop to being a first assistant camerawoman. F was now manager at the rental house, and Wendy was still a secretary for a production company.

They still got together once a month or so and had cleaning parties. All of the girls where messy, so spending a couple of hours each month to clean off their apartments together did help. Each girl would get a chore that they could somewhat tolerate, they would spend about an hour at each place...and well, maybe drink (Janice was a featherweight so usually she drove). Mainly they chatted about boys, music, or whatever. Sarah was the biggest nerd of the group by far, so constant talk about pop music was something she could kind of zone out on, but she was pleasant and she had fun. And occasionally they wouldn't bother with the chores, and watch a DVD or something.

It was Thursday around 7. Sarah had spent about 7 hours in the studio which was pretty easy work in the business. She felt kind of awake to be honest. It was the kind of night she could have gone out and fought crime. But crime would have to wait.

Or maybe spent some time with her little magic wand (don't judge her). It was often said of superheroes that their powers made them super-horny. Not Sarah, not really.  Her libido  was normal, maybe a tad above average, but really, she could manage it.

But Sarah couldn't help rubbing her legs together a bit as she sat on her bed. She knew would have to get dressed after taking off her work clothes to put on some old sweats (that were rubbing her breasts just the right way) She had to get to Janice’s house by  7:30   . She did have 15 minutes. if she ran and jumped there, she could do it three times as fast as driving. And she was feeling worked up...

She sighed. No, that probably wouldn’t work.

Then her hand found its way into her sweats pants. Ahh, fuck.

****

It was around 7:40 when a slightly flushed and unshowered Sarah made her way to Janice’s house (and it was a house, even if like a lot of places in the Southbay it had no yard or anything). Janice at some point had invested in the kind of furniture one would get from an Italian store. It was brass bowls and strong colors.  Still, Janice was nice enough, if maybe a tad withdrawn, and they got along okay. Sarah was the last person there but no one commented.

"Tough day at the shoot"

"Good episode?" asked F. F was the type of person who worked in TV but never actually watched much of it. She was the kind of conventional attractive that one would see from across the street, until you realize that she kind of had a strange personality. How strange was hard to say.

"Ahhh, the directors not bad actually," Sarah commented "He’s done some Indie movies you never heard of, and he’s trying some interesting stuff with the camera"

The actual answer was, 'No, it was pretty terrible', but Sarah was not the type in Hollywood to bad-mouth the crap she worked on.

"Bought some margarita mixes. Three in the package, a forth I made my own," said Wendy. “Let’s have ourselves a night."

Wendy drank.  The imprecise amount of alcohol in her drink suggested that she may in fact have a 'dranking' problem.  owever, she was a pleasant enough person either sober or drunk, and she was good with a vacuum.

Wendy vacuumed. F could dust with the best of them. Janice could wash and clean a kitchen to spotlessness. Sarah had learned something about herself.  She actually could tolerate cleaning other people’s bathrooms, despite what people did in bathrooms. She was tolerant of shit and blood she found, well, she could handle it. It wasn't that hard.  This was despite the fact that they had by moving doubled the number of bathrooms she did in the night from 3 to 6. She found she was better at a really good once over.

Sarah spent about 30 minutes in the bathroom. It was kind of hard to hear Janice talking about her boyfriend, who was clearly coming over a lot. Pee stains on the side of the toilet confirm this, and the **** vague/vast **** amounts of it suggested it wasn't from one visit.

He was really into sports, and Janice’s voice suggested that she was in a particular stage of maybe caring about sports herself.

Sarah had seen sporting events of course, on occasion, but had never managed to care about it. With her great gifts at all athletic endeavours she had tried, basketball, softball and tennis had been trifles, not worth the bother to win, or watch the other players loose. She got peeved at them for their lack of ability. It was around Junior High when her abilities fully blossomed that her parents suggested she faked being bad, to go into the background and not become the worlds best tennis player or fastest  miler . She agreed, and never did much in the way of traditional athletics again...and never bother watching it either. Why didn't that basketball player do a slam dunk from half court like she could? Instead, she found a whole world of comicbooks and action figures to bide her time.

It should be noted, as said before, that Sarah Jennings was secretly ‘Mazing Girl, champion of Los Angeles. None of her friends here knew. The only friend who knew (except for Knife Girl, who was also a hero), was Jim...an ex-boyfriend who was now just a friend...but he knew her secret. The rest just assumed she was a plumpy, vaguely semi-put-together nerd. A nerd who was friendly enough, enjoyed a beer,  and was a good shoulder to talk to And willing, in Janice’s case, to clean her bathroom of a lot crud this week. Ahh well.

Yet they were her friends and she was glad for them. She knew other superheroes spent a lot of time mainly together forming cliques and circles. She wanted to you know actual humanity. She worked all day with actors, and had seen what happened to them...how they could grow isolated in their fame. Even the friendliest of stars, tended to have an aura of isolation...of distance. She shook her head. Not for her. Theoretically there were methods through advertising or some foundation she could be 'mazing full time, but she was glad for being her.

"Ooh! A quarter!" she said, as she found it behind the toilet. She paused Janet was a good friend.  And 25 cents had some value as money. But ahh, it was hers.

It took her about 30 minutes to clean bathroom one, 10 to clean bathroom two (the half bath off the main living room), and a glance at the small bathroom for Janice’s unused second and third bedrooms to confirm that, once again, no one had used them since last time. Hell, she probably should do some light dusting.  Meanwhile the other girls finished their chores, and some margaritas were consumed.  It wasn't a great evening, but the margaritas were starting to kick in when Janice agreed to drive them to Sarah’s condo to get going.

Sarah was a little embarrassed by her little two bedroom condo. One bedroom was obviously a bedroom with a giant bed, and the second was used as an office/workroom that in actual working periods didn't see much use, other then to paint models or the occasional action figure (her hobby). It was maybe a tad bigger then a two bedroom apartment, but only a tad. Some posters, some of them signed by the original artist, lined the wall...but they weren't framed or anything. She could have probably, theoretically, afforded more...but ehh, it was her little piece of El Segundo magic (though it didn't have a view of the ocean or anything).

She didn't have a Batcave. She had thought about getting, like, a bat-computer or something, but had no idea what she would actually do with it. She put some news apps on her phone and felt she was giving due diligence in that department. 

Still, secrecy made her keep her costume, and her backup costume in the trunk of her car. What if they came across her embarrassing secret!! The vibrator she kept in her room worried her, but less. She drove her car home, feeling sober enough to drive, hoping that a cop would agree...and not find her secret. This would be the most embarrassing way to loose your secret identity imaginable. Unless midgets or people wearing furry costumes were involved.

Well what can you do? She hadn't drank that much yet, and it would be a pain to get the car tomorrow.

It was on the drive home that she noticed it. Well...heard it. She turned on local news.

“A large apartment fire is raging in Torrance this evening...”

She could have driven there in, what? 2 minutes? She was good with fires. Her powers made these kinds of events trivial.

But she had guests coming home. And an apartment to clean...

"No causalities have been reported as yet, but fire-crews are on the scene, rescuing people...”

Friends. And she had promised snacks.

She got home and opened the door for everyone.

"Someone’s been messy" F teased.

Well screw you. But she had guests.

She worked on cleaning her own bathroom.  She hadn't been that bad really, but clearly at some point she had spilled some stuff.

The girls talked. She turned on the radio.

"What’s going on?" asked Wendy.

"Just listening."

"...artment fire in Torrance. It has spread to an adjoining building...and the super villain known as Deca is at the site.” They played Deca’s voice: "PEOPLE OF LOS ANGELES, BUT MAINLY THE WRETDCHED CREATURE KNOWN AS ‘MAZING GIRL, COME TO ME!!! OR I WILL DESTROY YOUR PRECIOUS CITY, BUILDING BY BUILDING!!!”

Deca. He was her arch-nemeses. His real name was Arthur Macquire, and like her had a superpower: Telepathy. He had used it in a productive way. For insider trade so much that it hurt. But as he read peoples mines he learned dirty secrets (and clean ones) about earnings reports etc. It was never proven that he actually talked to anyone, which just meant he was very lucky at the stock market.

Still, Sarah had captured him about two years ago. But not on this. For Macquire wanted to be a real supervillain too. Despite making millions and millions and owning a very large mansion in  Bel Air (She had been there. It was pretty sweet), he had invested in thugs, private armies, and most notably power-armor. She remembered the truck incident about a month ago. That so could have been him. He liked armor and machines and things like that, and despite having no real technical skill had invested in tons. Plus he had a snazzy black cape.

But why? Even at his trial he had never really given a good answer as to what the end-game was. It wasn't money. He wasn't trying to take over the world or destroy it. What his end-game was, despite really being mad at her for capturing him, was never known. The government had taken his house, his cars, and his gay lovers (well the government didn't take that but that had been the result).

She hoped he wasn't monarching her from the Venture Bros, because she always found that show tiresomely up its own ass.

He had managed to escape jail using his a’Mazing powers to get past the guards (or possibly bribed them) and had spent a lot of time trying to enact some terrible vengeance on her.

This was pretty brazen.

But, well...she had bathrooms to clean.

"We have fresh reports that Nighthawk and The Glider are now on the scene. One unconfirmed sighting of Knife Girl...”

She finished early and helped Janice in the kitchen.

"You doing something interesting with cheese," Janice said.

"Made some pretty kicking fajitas the other night."

She wanted to be social but she only half paid attention.

"This is something to see, Jim. Glider is setting down anti-aircraft style fire from his laser at Deca, while Nighthawk is trying a more hands on strategy. However, Deca’s armor is extremely powerful, and it maybe to much for him to...”

"WHERE IS ‘MAZING GIRL!? DO NOT PESTER ME WITH THESE PATHETIC FOES!!”

Her apartment was pretty easy to clean. It was small, before they then moved on to F’s largish house. Sarah paused to consider. Should she call it a night? People’s lives could, you know, be at stake, and all...

"Hey, you know guys...um...I’m feeling a little...well I’m feeling a little...crampy.”

“Urgh,” uttered Wendy.

"We’re at my house already...I don't think the alcohol was helping..."

"Alcohol helps all problems," Wendy said.

"I don't want you have to drive me home early."

"That’s a good idea" said Janice. “We’ll finish up here."

And they did finish up, helpfully, as Sarah lay on her bed. And listened.

"WHERE IS ‘MAZING GIRL? WATCH ME RIP THE SKULL FROM THIS PRETENDER!"

"Oh my...Nighthawk...how to describe it...wait, wait. Knife Girl IS here. Knife Girl is here...She’s throwing knives at Deca, which seems to have distracted him from killing nighthawk. Deca’s coming over to attack...Glider just came down and kicked him. No wait! Deca has hit Glider’s hang-glider and he’s down. God! He’s down! Nighthawk is up and going at Deca from behind...and wait...Knife Girl has stuck a knife in Deca’s back...it looks...it looks like it hit something important. Sparks are flying...”

"DAMM YOU!! WHERE IS ‘MAZING GIRL!!!?”

“Deca has thrown down all three heroes with just a thrust of his hand. Like they’re dominos...bowling pins...now he’s running away...running...”

"PESTERING ANTS...NO I WILL NOT ANSWER QUESTIONS FROM THE MEDIA...”

"I think we’re done in here.”

"Thanks, guys," Sarah said as she helped them out. “I really got to thank you all.”

"What are friends for? See in you a couple of weeks.”

"I'll buy some really kick-ass cleanser. And some better margaritas."


*******

It was about 30 minutes before she got to the scene. The fire was still blazing, but all the people had been evacuated. Not much she could do. Still she made an appearance, looking over the wreckage.

She looked over at the building from another side.

"Where were you?" demanded Nighthawk, coming from the shadows.

"Um, I had personal business to attend to...I came as fast as I could.”

"That clown of a friend of yours, Knife Girl, almost got me killed," said Nighthawk, "We almost got killed, and Glider...”

Glider was a telekinetic, which meant he could move things with his mind. Mainly himself. He couldn't fly, perse, as his powers tired his mind quickly, but he could manipulate a hang-glider to provide lift and float so he could kind of fly. He also had a laser from somewhere.

"I heard you, all of you did pretty well...you and Knife Girl made a pretty good team."

Nighthawk shrugged. "She’s a menace."

"Right," said ‘Mazing girl. "Sorry I couldn't help more."

"You are the most powerful among us ‘Mazing girl. Frankly you’re among the top five in the world. You have to be responsible with these gifts, use them well, or they might as well not be there."

"I came as soon as I could. You know super-battles. This was done in like 5 minutes. I can't be everywhere."

Nighthawk didn't answer,   he just slinked off into the shadows dropping into the night .

Sarah sat down on the buildings edge. She was feeling really guilty about letting down two sides of her life. Wendy’s bathroom would not be as fresh as it could be...and Deca had escaped to possibly threaten millions.

Life. Well...life.

The first mission of the Ubergirls

He wasn't wearing a wedding ring. Still that didn't mean much.

It was the kind of observation that indicated one was thinking a certain way. When Sarah, after a second, realized she shouldn't. Nighthawk looked a lot like Batman from the comics. Huge muscles, a huge football players body to house them, thick black hair, and a face that suggested it may have been scarred at some point. In a comic it would look cool and brooding. In a pie restaurant at 2:00 AM it looked kind of sad...and a tad creepy.

There were about six superheroes in Los Angeles. Well...define Los Angeles. Orange County was kind of its own thing and there where two people there. There also was Eagleman, who protected only Eagle Rock (a very small suburb) so he didn't quite count. So there were maybe about 6 people with costumes, 4 others who weren't heroes perse...but when things got heavy did stuff with their God-given super-might. One of them, Bill Roberts, could stretch his arms about 10 or so feet. Kind of fun. He painted houses.

Los Angeles was a big city...second biggest in the country. And Sarah was probably the most powerful hero in it. She was extremely strong, faster then a speeding Ferrari and able to jump over tall buildings in a single bound (actually she had jumped over the Bank One tower downtown, the tallest building west of the Mississippi, a couple of weeks ago...just for the thrill). Her powers, her skill...it kind of made her embarrassed to be honest.  It was a lot of responsibility for someone who liked to occasionally lie at home and watch marathons of Doctor Who and eat tacos.

But with great power comes great responsibility.

And this was really cutting into her lounging around time.

If she was the city’s Superman, Nighthawk was its batman. The powerful mysterious figure who stalked the mean streets of LA. In his brooding black bodysuit and bird-like mask (which was very good, a much better costume then Sarah’s own) he looked mysterious and frightening. Even to her. There was something about the fake dead eyes of the bird that made it look horrible.

But now he was wearing a business suit that looked to be worth more than her condo.

One occasionally saw a comic scene where two superheroes met at a bar (stop me if you heard this one) or a restaurant (like the rotating pie restaurant they were in) and talk while wearing their ridiculous costumes. They had done that scene in Iron Man 2 at a donut shop. In reality when superheroes did this they normally changed to what ever normal clothing they had and that was that. Even the superheroes who didn't have a secret identity as such usually had a set of chinos they could squeeze into. It made things less awkward.

Sarah sat across from the guy, wearing an old T shirt with a picture of the smurfs, and a skirt that she had bought for maybe 10 dollars some place with her Mary-Janes. Her glasses were pinched up to her shoulder length red hair. She looked, well...she looked like a nerd. Which was fine. But a p0ur nerd. Maybe a hipster nerd. But in truth poor was a more accurate description.

He obviously wasn't poor.

He didn't give a name, she didn't give a real name, but she could tell this man had millions with a 'M'. Maybe even more zeros. It made sense...Nighthawk didn't boast fancy cars or helicopters but it didn't mean they didn't exist. Batman had a mint behind him. Crime fighting with cash.

She tried to place him. Producer? Possibly, but a little too sure of himself. She knew some producers working in the entertainment industry. Lawyer? Business Exec? Couldn’t work, but still looked a little manicured.  Trust-fund kid? A possibility...a strong possibility. She looked at his hands again.  Did he mani-pedi?

"We already have an informal network going," Nighthawk said. "I want to make it more...official. I have connections with the police. Whenever there’s trouble I want a good team ready to meet the threat."

Even out of his uniform he sounded in charge. 

"So you, me...obviously," she said trying to duplicate her ‘Mazing girl voice. Poorly really. "The Flame, Glider...Knife Girl..."

"Not her. She’s a loose canon. A rogue. We can't depend on her."

Knife Girl was a woman who was kind of like Green Arrow, who threw knives at people. Mostly she did it so the knives hit their clothing or something (she had, she suspected, some form of superpower to aim them). Occasionally they hit someone’s arms. She hurt people. Criminals, mostly...but she kind of broke the unwritten rule of superheroics (and of wrestling) regarding edged weapons. She was also a lot of fun when she was drunk, and Sarah’s best friend of all the superheroes. Her real name was Jamey. She was an actress who did commercials and guest-starred as teenagers in sitcoms (she looked younger then she really was but that wasn't a power perse).

Sarah pondered this. Mainly she pondered if Nighthawk was going to pick up the costs of the pie she was eating. It was a German apple and really good.  He obviously could afford it. She hadn't ordered a beverage.

"How elaborate is this? Do you want, like, a base, an office...support staff?" Sarah looked; he was drinking an orange juice.

A couple of months ago she read an online magazine about the super-world (Yes superheroes read magazines about themselves (So do most famous people)). She learned the Justice Lords of Chicago had an annual budget of nearly 50 million dollars. Base security, team monitoring, IT, PR, business taxes...  And they didn't actually pay their members. Sarah who was on hiatus from her role as a prop master for a TV show, thought about that one. She did a little work on the side working on Indie films, but the union would frown upon that.

"Nothing like that" Nighthawk informed her. "Maybe just phones with a pager app to let us each know. I have some people who can put it together...anonymously of course.  When the police or anyone else needs us, we respond. I already do this personally. Secretly...as to them I am a menace...but..."

She nodded. Knife Girl; She was her friend.

"If Knife Girl is out, I'm not doing it. She’s not that bad really."

"I'm sorry you feel that way," said Nighthawk.

"I mean...that would just isolate her, hurt her feelings. Like I said, she’s got a good head on her shoulders for small group tactics. Whenever we team-up she knows how to take ’em on. Ten men at once...power-suit guys. For the heavy hitters." She didn't mention late night karaoke sessions. She really didn't mention that one awkward time they had kissed in a bar. When the guys had egged them on (which was just as well as Jamey was engaged to a handsome fellow).

"Whenever we get together, it’s just oil and water, Nighthawk remarked, “She can't follow my direction, she doesn't know the proper protocols...

Sarah nodded. Lead. Protocols. It sounded like a team needed a leader, and that’s clearly what he wanted to be. Of course, they weren't in the field, but the more she talked to him in person the more she doubted that this would work well.

She then made a bigger realization. She was ‘Mazing girl.

"And if I, ‘Mazing Girl, isn't in...it’s probably not worth bother of doing."

She was the most well known (currently: in 2013) and most powerful (actually pretty much ever) hero in LA. And now she was also acting a bit like a bitch. Oh well.

Nighthawk shook his head. "I'll think about it," he said, exactly like a producer would say. He stood up. "Separate cheques...I got an orange juice.”

The bastard.

*****

"You didn't have to do that" Said Knife Girl. It was the next night and they where sitting on a rooftop overlooking south downtown LA.

Sarah wore her ‘Mazing woman costume and looked a’Mazing: red pants, red tank, black domino mask matched with her blue ‘Mazing symbol. Knife Girl wore a black cape with knives inside down one side of her body over pants and a white shirt that the cape covered most of. This was a shame, because Knife Girl had really great abs.

Sarah smiled "You’re the best tactician in the city. We need you."

I mean exceptional abs. Grate things and such.

"The thing of it is," said Knife Girl, "Is that every time I am together with Nighthawk we seem to get along okay. I mean he doesn't knife people, but we’re civil. I wouldn't call him a...friend..." 

Sarah smiled. "Nuts to him. He’s a crypto fascist type anyway. Maybe we should start are own team. An all-girl team...no icky boys allowed."

"So you, me, um, the flame?" Knife Girl said.

the flame(always spelled with a lower case)  was a psychic who could read minds and set fires. She was kind of creepy too; in her gingham dresses that made her look 12 (the fact that she was flat as a pancake didn't help). She had a way of looking at you that made Sarah feel weird at times. Like she knew your deepest thoughts. And your weaknesses.  She wasn't against her...girl power and all, but...

"Maybe not."

"Fair enough," said Knife.  

This made Sarah feel bad. It had to be tough to be psychic hero. She wondered if Flame had a nice homelife. Someone to come home to. Sarah didn't. She had felt judgey the last couple of days.

"You know what? It’s not a bad idea. Let’s do it. The Ubergirls."

Maybe they could get Lavender from Orange County. Despite the name she was kind of a ninja...albeit one who wore purple, and who did a lot of good stuff with computers and infiltration. Lavender also made her sound less Vietnamese. Maybe The Black Dancer...who was either a street performance artist in South Central or a superhero, or maybe just walked the uncomfortable line of someone who spent a lot of time on anti gang initiatives.  

They both discussed it some more and then realized that the phone setup, and other things, would probably cost at least 50k, neither of which they had. They could setup a 501c but that never worked out as well as you hoped. It wasn't a bad idea, but...

She felt it run down her spine.

"Something up?" asked Knife Girl, adjusting her suit a bit as she jumped up.

"Something about three blocks away. East." Her vague power to detect crime and evil were, well...very vague, but when she worked she could get there.

"There’s a loading dock there," Knife Girl remembered.

‘Mazing girl nodded. "Want a lift?"

Knife Girl nodded back and ‘Mazing girl put a hand behind her waist, and jumped.

Three blocks worked out about half a mile, which wasn't hard by any means. Still, it was dark and hard to judge plus she was holding someone, who was not of the mind to be merely impressed. She jumped and landed on a small building...and hoped she hadn’t made too much noise.

Knife Girl ran to the edge. She had better eyes the Sarah did. Maybe it was a power...maybe it wasn't.

"Three trucks being robbed. Five guys are unloading, with two guys watching the three drivers. Looks gang related. I'll take out the guys holding up the drivers: they have got guns. You handle the loading guys. I'll come in support if I see an opening. Simultaneous.”

‘Mazing girl noted. "On three...one...two...three.”

‘Mazing girl jumped in the air. She could see two knives flying through the air even as she did so. She landed on top one of the thugs, and it looked like she knocked him out. Also possibly broke his leg.

She looked around. Fighting five guys was tricky. They had two more likely strategies.  Either they all attacked her together, which confused her a bit before she beat them up, or they ran away, which was probably the better strategy for their part (some of them would get away) and less painful for her, as it looked like some of them had weapons of some kind. But mostly better for them. She turned around...it looked like they we’re going for option 1.

Fine.

They came at her. She knocked one of them out against a van with a quick hit. Normal thugs weren't much of a threat to her, but just to add a little fear to the event, one of them managed to come behind her and hit her with a length of two-by-four. She would feel that at some point. She extended her arm to grab it, but missed, feeling a bit woozy. His next attack didn't have the element of surprise so she was able to dodge it and move in to knock him out. The forth guy was a lot larger then the others. He came at her a massive arm swing she came in with a punch to the gut. Hers was better.

Sarah turned to see the fifth guy to draw a gun at her. She didn't like guns on a personal level. She was more or less bulletproof, but the “less” got to her. And her costume wasn't at all. Just then however a knife went to the guys throat.

"Drop it, Mister, before I drop you." Behind him, Knife Girl was standing and holding her blade fairly close to his femoral artery. Her favourite artery.
He dropped his gun.

"Good work."

Just then Sarah heard a noise from the back of the truck "Did I miss-count?" asked Knife Girl.

"Nope," said the thug.

For out of the top of the cab, breaking through the roof, sprang to life a giant metal monster. 15 feet tall on its spindly legs. He had giant giant guns attached to him, but no arms. Just guns. Machine guns. Out of the top of it was the barest glimmer of a small cabin. It looked a lot like a walker from Star Wars except you could see a lot of the machinery that made it work and it lacked a cool white paint job. It was more gunmetal.

"Shit," said Knife Girl. She dropped the thug and ran, ducking as gunfire came at her.

"Oh shit!" went ’Mazing girl.  She covered her face with her hands and ducked as bullets pelted her. They hurt. She ran backwards behind a cab for cover.

The machine started to walk out, making scary noises.

Knife Girl had found cover too, and tossed a knife at an exposed wire. If it did something important it didn't look like it. The machine turned, however, and shot at her position.

"Not good."

‘Mazing Girl considered her position. The legs were an obvious target. However, there were still thugs lying on the ground and people about and she didn't want to knock it over hurting them with the guns. A powerful punch? Not a lot of great options.

"Not good."

Instead Sarah ran over to Knife Girl, standing behind her. "Any teamwork solution I’m missing?"

"Not seeing one."

It was then they noticed that the machine had circled around in behind them. It was quicker then they assumed. It lowered its guns at them, and prepared to shoot. ‘Mazing girl moved her body to cover the more  vulnerable Knife Girl but wasn't sure how well that would work.

When she heard the sound of hissing...

‘Mazing Girl turned to look, to see that the mech was stoping. It looked as if its engine was on fire, and experiencing the kind of pain a mechanic knew all too well. It shot its guns for a moment in panic, however it just burned up the gun barrels making mini explosions. It looked to be on fire...then it fell down. The glass broke as it did, revealing a small panic-stricken guy, obviously trapped.

Behind the fallen mech stood the Eternal Flame.  Well, it was obviously her. But instead of her gingham dress she was wearing a nice-ish evening gown with a small jacket. As she was maybe five feet tall the emphasis was on small.

The flame walked round.

"it was mainly hydraulics, you see. and that can't stand too much heat. easy to overload the motivators on its legs. as for the guns, well you have seen me do it."

"What are you doing here?" said Sarah. 

"i was going to an art opening of a friend downtown. i heard the commotion and came over."

Sarah felt very bad right now for saying such bad things earlier. Still, there was a small almost palatable sense that somewhere “Ring Around the Rosey” was playing in an extremely minor key. Still...

"You know" said Knife Girl, "We were just thinking about you."

And so they went to an all-night donut place (which the painfully thin flame abstained from) and talked about the future of the Ubergirls.

This ended up, for a variety of reasons, never actually happening...but a fun evening was had by all.